Dear Princess Santa?

Tonight during dinner, Olivia started talking about random things. One of those things was a letter she recently wrote to Princess Jasmine from the movie "Aladdin". She was very serious when she told me about the letter.

Let me back up just so you know what was running through my mind as Olivia spoke. Olivia is in the Fourth Grade and is almost 10 years old. Olivia was a very easy baby, easy toddler and easy-ish preschooler. That all changed when she was in the First Grade, which is when somebody made Olivia feel like she had to pick either Mommy or Daddy's side instead of staying neutral. Since then, Olivia has been...a challenge. She yells at me (indoor voice? ha!). She's disrespectful (her tongue will get stuck sticking out of her mouth if she keeps it up). She cusses at me (yep, it's true...I'm apparently a bitch). She throws things (like shoes) at my head while I'm driving. She kicks me (want to see the bruises on my legs?). She breaks my things (and then replaces those things with her very own money). She runs off in public and tells people that I left her alone (I was paged in a store just last Friday). Someone who was recently close to me but is thankfully no longer around called her a complete nightmare.

Here's the thing: I can tell that she is very much aware of the "nightmare" she is and doesn't feel good about herself when she acts that way. Olivia knows that I do not deserve such treatment but she is unable to accept her life as it is and that frustrates her. She takes those frustrations out on me. Olivia is smarter than me and smarter than her father. She watches everything and nothing gets past her. She partially thinks that she's an adult and argues argues argues. She's a tough cookie...in a lot of bad ways. I'd like to see her be tough in good ways.

So, back to the letter...

I remember when I was in the Fourth Grade right about this time of year, my brother (Kindergarten) and I were writing letters to Santa. I can't remember the beginning of my letter but I know halfway down I switched to cursive so Joe wouldn't be able to read what I wrote. The cursive part went something like this:

Mom, I am writing in cursive so Joe won't know that Santa isn't real. I really want an Easy Bake Oven so I can make cookies and brownies. I don't want any of the things I printed. I really really really want an Easy Bake Oven.

There was more to the letter but all I asked for was an Easy Bake Oven and I went on and on about what a good big sister I was by taking the Cursive Precaution to keep Santa alive for my little brother. Apparently, I thought Mom would appreciate that I was in cahoots with her and reward me by placing a plastic box with a light bulb inside wrapped up all prettily under the tree.

(Yes, Joe, I pulled a fast one on you. So sorry. If it makes you feel any better, do you remember me ever having an Easy Bake Oven? Didn't think so.)

I did, however, get a cassette tape of Olivia Newton John's "Physical" that year. I just love leg warmers!

When Olivia started talking about her letter to Princess Jasmine today, I could tell she still thought Jasmine was real. Her eyes were serious and she said it was very very important that I find Jasmine's address and send her the letter. All I could think about was how it didn't make sense that this uber-smart Fourth Grade girl thought Jasmine was real when I knew Santa was a hoax as a slightly above-average Fourth Grade girl *mumble-mumble* years ago. So, I told Olivia to bring me the letter and I would send it out tomorrow.

When Olivia went to bed, I opened the envelope and read the letter for the purpose of faking a response from Jasmine in a couple of weeks:

Dear Princess Jasmine,

My name is Olivia and I am 9 years old. You are my favorite princess. I saw your play when Mama took me to Disneyland. I was the girl who gave you the leaf. My mom was the lady who took our picture. She has short hair but does not look like a boy. I am mean to her but she is still nice to me. I have been reading your "Princess Manners" book. I am trying to help her more and not be so mean. I do the dishes a lot. Say hi to Aladdin and Raja for me.

Sincerely,
Olivia

Am I going to mail this letter to Agrabah? Nope. I'm going to keep it to remind myself that Olivia is a just a kid and not to change anything I am doing because even though she wears me out, something is getting through to her. I will tell her to be quiet when she yells. I won't accept bratty behavior. I will have her apologize if she calls me a bad name. I won't allow her to throw things or kick my shins. I will continue to make her replace anything of mine that she breaks. I won't let her know that when she sneaks away from me in public, I am still watching her. I will not let an adult tell me that she is a "nightmare" and use Olivia as an excuse for his/her own bad behavior instead of being supportive. Those types of "adults" are not welcome in my life and the only point he/she proved is that he/she has some growing up to do. I have my own mixed up kid to raise; I don't need the adult version draining my energy as well.

Does this make me a bitch? Nope. It makes me a tough cookie...in a good way. And that is something I will not change.

People would be so much happier if they took a simpler approach to things they didn't like by changing what they can change, accepting what they can't change and adapting to life after change. Anything else is just complicating things for the sake of fighting change, which is frustrating and unnecessary. Adults need to set the example for kids so kids won't become mixed up adults.

Olivia can wash all of the dishes she wants. Princess Jasmine thinks it is a step in the right direction.

23 Things

In honor of the 23rd day of the month, I am going to list 23 things that frustrate and annoy me or that I'm not happy about in general (in no particular order):

1. The spot in the middle of my spine that feels like it needs to crack
2. All of the laundry waiting to be laundered
3. No matter how hard I try to keep my car uncluttered, Olivia fills it up with papers from school every day of every week
4. Outsourcing to India
5. My car needs new tires and brakes
6. Olivia won't stop drinking straight from the milk carton
7. My yard and how I cannot keep up with it
8. The slick of sweat that covers me by the end of every day even if I haven't done anything physically taxing
9. It is almost impossible to have an adult life for more than two to ten hour increments once a week at the most
10. Toenails
11. Trying to find a venue for my class reunion that isn't the Elks or some random grange
12. Having a major coughing fit if I laugh or am not careful about the way I breathe when talking even though I haven't been sick for over a week
13. Plucking my eyebrows
14. All of the stuff that is still in my house that I need to get rid of even though I just purged a lot in a garage sale
15. Sick kids (mine or my cousins'/friends' kids)
16. Wanting what I can't have due to life getting in the way
17. The weird smell in my car
18. Olivia's sass and drama
19. People who are not completely honest and/or conceal things for their own selfish reasons - especially when it is detrimental to and/or hurts others
20. Cellulities
21. Feeling like I never have enough time to truly explore the things and people I find interesting and would like to know more about
22. Living too far away/Life being too busy to be able to spend time with my closest friends
23. Not being able to watch the Blazer games because I don't have Comcast Cable

Well, it appears I am not happy with reality at the moment. Sounds like I need to grow up and be a big girl some day soon.

I'm Baaaaack...Maybe...

I'm seriously thinking about blogging again. Now, to find something blog-worthy...

Groovy!

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

I Have No Words